If I were a great leader, I would ...

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Everyday, we see all of these guys and ladies around us doing great things and making a difference. That's great, but how do we do the same thing?  

Here is what I would do, if I were a great leader  ... 

Lead myself well. 

- Feed myself the word of God.

- Spend one hour per day mastering my craft. 

- Workout at least 30 minutes per day. 

- Have a hobby. 

Lead my family well. 

-  Date Days

-  Time with kids 

-  Phone off by 7pm every night 

-  Enjoy every day because tomorrow comes to quickly

Know the answer to the three most important questions of life. 

Leadership is influence nothing more and nothing less. 

Answering three questions will give you influence - allow you to lead. 

Who am I?

Why am I here?

Where am I going?

Look at the Apostle Paul

Who am I?   I am Apostle

Why am I here?      To be all things to all men might win some

Where am I going?    Forgetting the past I am pressing on to the high calling in Christ

Look at the Partier from back in your High School Days. 

This guys never went to a party alone ... why? He could answer these three questions. 

Who am I?    I am a partier

Why am I here?   I am here to party

Where am I going?   I am going to a party - do you want to go?

Look at Jesus himself

Who am I?   I am the way truth and life

Why am I here?   I am here to seek and save the lost

Where am I going?   I am going to to prepare a place for you 

Let me ask you ...

Who are you?

Why are you here?

Where are you going?

Say "yes" less and "no" more often. 

We have one thing we need to accomplish. But we start saying yes to helping them, going there, hosting that, and before you know it we are doing so many things we aren't doing anything well. 

Great leaders are driven by principle, not by desire to please people. 

Do what I do best and delegate the rest. 

So much that needs to be done every week in life and ministry. You and I think we can do everything. But we cant! 

We need to - Do less, so we can do better. 

How to delegate?

1. Speak it verbally.  

2. Spell it out in writing.

3. Slowly release it to them. 

Hear before I speak. 

James 1:19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;

Don’t just listen - hear - to many times we listen to the sound someone is making with their mouth - but we don’t hear them - hear their pain - hear their excitement - hear what they are really saying. Far too often, we are too busy wanting to hear ourselves speak that we don’t really hear others 

Three tips for hearing.

1. Put phone down 

2. Look in the eye 

3. Don't be afraid to ask, "Can you tell me that again."

Don’t speak about how things are, but how they should be. 

James 3:3-4  If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs.

Power in words - James - your words take you where your are going. 

If all you do is talk about how things are … your words will keep you where you are

We can’t get volunteers 

Our volunteers never contact us back

We just don’t have the money 

I don’t know what to do 

All of these statements ... take you right back to where you currently are. They don't move you forward. 

Every great leader at the end of a problem … asks a question. 

How can we get volunteers - What can we do to hear back from them - What can I do to get more money - 

Don’t speak about how things are … ask questions … and speak howthey are going to be

Dream Big then get off the couch. 

God wants to do big things through us ... no just for us. 

Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us,

Every time in history (other than creation) that God did something ... he always used a person. 

Moses - David - Esther - God did big things through them … not for them 

God works through us .... not just for us. 

Proverbs 10:4 A slack hand causes poverty, but the hand of the diligent makes rich.

What could God do in your family - ministry - house - church …. he could do amazing things - if you allow him to do it through you 

Build a team to accomplish everything. 

Nothing great ever happens alone … it only happens through a team. 

Build a team to accomplish everything. 

Ephesians 4:11-12 And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ,

Team to prepare messages 

Team to do worship 

Team to handle finances

Team to clean the house - you don;t have to do it alone 

Team to set up and tear down 

Team to coordinate volunteers 

The work that leaders do is prepare others to do the work. Leaders build teams and by doing so we help people find their place … and things get accomplished. 

If I were a Great leader I would …. know I can’t do all of these at the same time. So I will pick two and begin applying them over the next two months. 

The steps of the righteous are ordered by the Lord 

We over estimate what we can do in a day - and underestimate what we can do in a lifetime.

Go back through these 9 points. Find one thing that you are dong well at. Find two things you need to improve on. Make these two your focus for the next two months.  

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17 things every youth pastor must do.

I recently did an audio podcast breaking down all 17 of these points in detail. To listen to the podcast CLICK HERE

1 - Love Jesus more than you love ministry.

2 - Love your spouse more than you love ministry. 

3 - Love your kids more than you love ministry. 

4 - Work for God, not a paycheck. 

5 - Serve you Pastor well. 

6 - Take care of your body. 

7 - Read one book per month. 

8 - Put more emphasis on the parents of teenagers. 

9 - Delegate one thing that you have been doing. 

10 - Memorize one scripture per month. 

11 - Listen more.

12 - Talk less. 

13 - Make a difference, not excuses. 

14 - Stop comparing yourself to them. 

15 - Dream big, then get off the couch. 

16 - Make disciples not attendees. 

17 - Preach the word. 

I recently did an audio podcast breaking down all 17 of these points in detail. To listen to the podcast CLICK HERE

Are you tired of the drama? Four ways to live a drama free life.

I don’t do drama. I just don't. Here are some reasons why:

Drama is waste of my time.
Life is way too short to get tangled up in in a bunch of stuff that is not going to move the ball forward.

Drama causes pain for me and for others. 
There have been times when I’ve put myself in the middle of issues that were not mine and every time I have … it explodes right back in my face.

The other reason I stay out of the DRAMA game is because God is not into drama.

Romans 12:8
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Here are 4 ways I strive to live a drama free life.

I control what I can control.

There are a lot of things in life I can’t control. I cant control what you think of me. I can’t control what you say about me. I can’t control what you facebook about me or how you act toward me.
I can’t control anything about anyone else … but I can control me.

So when it comes to drama, when things don’t go my way, or someone does something that I don’t like, or does something in a way I don’t appreciate … I do what only I can do. I control me.

I look in the mirror because I’m not perfect either.

I am addicted to Soda. If not careful I have a tendency to yell. I’m not the best with money and to be honest I think I can come across as and actually am pretty rude sometimes. I am anything but perfect in fact, I have some real deep seeded issues.

Because of this, it would be pretty hypocritical of me when someone does something they should not do – to sit here and point fingers at people or post some mean stuff on facebook putting someone else “in their place” when I know in my heart that every time I look in the mirror I am looking at someone just as bad and maybe even worse than they are. So looking in the mirror helps me keep my mouth shut and my fingers from typing words I will later regret.

I talk to the person or I talk to no one.

Mathew 18:15
“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.”

Scripture teaches that if I have someone that does something against me (something that ticks me off) it is my job to go to that person privately (not publically – not call them out on facebook or twitter) privately and talk to them about what happened. If they listen – which they probably will because I handled it in the right way – then everything is good.

This is very tough to do, because nobody (including me) likes one on one confrontation. I’m pretty brave driving home in the car replaying in my mind what I would say to that person if “I had the chance".  I can be very brave sitting in front of the computer or grabbing my phone to text an individual that is not sitting right in front of me.

Texting – Facebooking – Twittering in order to tell someone off is the easy thing to do. However, the right thing for me to do, the Godly thing is for me to go personally and talk one on one. 

I keep my problems off my Social Media Walls.

I am a fairly private person. I don’t have very many friends inside of my inner circle. I don’t like for people to know when I’m hurt, ticked or facing some issues, so this isn’t all that hard for me. I just keep my problems off of Facebook and I don’t comment on other peoples “problems” on Facebook or Twitter either. You will never see me involved in a facebook war or argument. It’s not going to happen because I don’t want the drama. 

Now even though I have not always walked these steps out perfectly, I have found that if I Control what only I can control, look in the mirror, talk to the person face to face, and keep my issues off of Facebook, that I can live a pretty drama free life …and I think you will too.

Is your team succeeding? Here is a formula for success!

In Ministry we all want more. More people. More Influence. More opportunity to minister to others.
In Luke 16 we see that when we are faithful with what we have been given, we will receive more. 

Faithfulness + Stewardship = Gain. 

Here are three things we need to faithfully steward in order to prove to God we are ready for increase. 

1 – TIME

Once it is spent, you can never get time back. So spend your time wisely.
Here are a few tips to faithfully steward your time.

Always have a notebook on you – especially in meetings

You never know when a great idea for a message, or ministry, is going to hit you so always have a notebook close by so you can write down the idea you have. Also, always and I do mean always have a notebook with you in meetings. God uses your superiors and your ministry partners to encourage an inform you so always be ready to learn. 

Prioritize your schedule.

What are the four big things that you need to get done this month? Write them down as well as all of the steps (to do’s) it is going to take for you and your team to complete them. At the end of the day, look over your list to not only see what you accomplished, but to take stock on how efficiently you spent your time. 

Four things you should do every day in ministry.

Have a Personal Study Time – message Prep does not count. 
Work on your Personal Health – workout at least 3 times per week. 
Team Building – Spend some time with your team – meeting, learning, eating, laughing.
Start checking things off your To Do List – Get to work doing the things you need to do.

Set your schedule and then work it. Make sure that you run your day don’t let your day run you.

Work hard and work smart, but get to work! Once your day is prioritized stick with it.
Don’t allow other things like Social Media, Phone Calls, or text you receive to get you off track or wasting time. 

2 – PEOPLE

We are in the people business. People are not only are goal, people are our greatest asset. So be a great steward of the people around you and you God will give you the honor of leading more people into a personal relationship with Him. Here are a few ideas. 

Invite one new person per week to church.

As a leader we need to be smoking what we are selling. There are people all around us everyday that need what we have (Jesus) invite at least one person to experience Jesus at your church service every week.

Talk with people at Church.

To many times we get so busy doing ministry on the weekends that we don’t spend any real time with the people we are ministering too. Each week work the halls of your church, talking, laughing and setting up a time to hang out, talk or grab a coffee with people during the week. 

Meet with at least 1 different person each week to build community.

People spell love T.I.M.E. If you want people to know you love them you have to spend time with them outside of the four walls of the Church. Once they know you love them … they may actually start believing that Jesus loves them too.

Get people on your team and keep them on your team.

Don’t be afraid to have a big ASK. Ask people to join your team!
Three things that will get people to join your team are Vision – Relationship – Authentic Authority.
Remember, the same three things that get them to join your team will also keep them on your team.

3 – EQUIPMENT

If we are not faithful with what we have, we will never be trusted with more! Here are a few ideas for being faithful with equipment.

Get the best price you possibly can on everything you buy.

Never be the “I want something for free” Church (I don’t think that is a good representation of who Jesus is) but also never be frivolous with your spending either. 

Get what we need and then take care of what you get.

I don’t think this point doesn’t need much explaining. 

Don’t treat equipment like it is yours … treat it like it is God’s.

Your computer, your desk, your office, your drum kit, projector and screen do not belong to you they belong to God. Even if you bought it with your own money .. .it does not belong to you. Scripture teaches that “The Earth is the Lords and everything in it” so everything you have is not yours … it belongs to God. So treat it that way.

 

 

10 Commandments of Parenting

One of the things that I absolutely love to do is partner with local churches around the country by doing Parent Conferences and Parent Weekends. 

As we are starting to set our schedule for this next years speaking dates on parenting, I found myself going through some of the notes of sessions that I teach and thought that I would put a few of the bullet points up on a blog for parents to check out. 

Here are the 10 Commandments of Parenting. 

1 – Walk with Jesus
2 – Love and Serve your spouse
3 – Investigate before giving permission
4 – Don’t say it if you don’t mean it
5 – Set strong boundaries
6 – Speak God’s word over your children
7 – Stay in Control
8 – Pray over your kids every day
9 – Make a memory
10 – Enjoy today because tomorrow comes too quickly

If you would like more inspiration, you can check out our messages on Parenting and Family Life, by  CLICKING HERE . This will take you to TheCHURCH at Visalia youtube page. There you can view teaching series titled FAMILY MATTERS, WE ARE BRINGING FAMLY BACK and more.